my hairdressers advice

I have had the same hairdresser for the past 13 years. I sit down in her chair, and she just does my hair, she picks the color, and as long as she leaves my length alone, she can do whatever she likes. She knows what suits my busy lifestyle, my skin-tone and well personal preferences. I am completely comfortable with her, and she has been with me through the best and worst times of my life.

She said i looked lovely this morning in my white and black cotton a-line skirt with white piping, my favorite black top, and my black ballerina flats. She looked at me a second time, and said you aren't feeling well again are you? I had to confess it has been a difficult week , and i am still trying to cope with the pain, and my bad habit of doing too much. Somehow, i am supposed to stop working before i get too tired, or the pain gets out of control, or the pain will get out of control.

She reminded me that #1 i need to take care of myself in order to care for my family, and it is not a bad thing to tell people no. I had already planned to take the summer off as much as possible, but then i went and opened my big fat mouth and agreed to run the kitchen for vbs.

I have worked every vbs for the last 14 years at our present church, and today it really hit me, i am unable to take on this responsibility...i cannot do everything i have always done. i am really bad at pushing myself beyond what i physically can do. It took the concern of my dear hairdresser to remind me of that.

I feel like a bad person, and i hate to let my friends down, but in my heart i know God is nudging me to decline. I do not have the strength at this time to share so much of myself, even for a very good cause.

I am not even certain we will make vbs, or make it every night. They have changed it this year to evenings from 6:00-8:00. I don't know how i will manage that and meals for my group, plus, my husband is off on Mon, Tues, andWed. I don't think he would like me gone every evening, and as it is 25miles one way to church from our home, the drive alone would be very exhausting.

Ashley, Nicole, and Jonathan still have piano lessons every Wed. afternoon until recital June 26th and they need that practice time with their teacher.

I feel torn, am i a bad person for backing out of vbs. The DRE is one of my best friends at church, and i know she needs help and support, if i tell my church members that God is leading me to be still, they will think i am nuts or lazy... i don't know...please pray that the Lord guides me in this matter. I don't think i am supposed to sacrifice my health to please other people.