Tuesday, September 30, 2008

A new patron saint

Dear Fr. Matthew called to check on me today. He said he was feeling a bit concerned, and wanted to check in. He asked had I heard back from the Dr. about all my lab work, how was I feeling?

Well, the labwork came back showing I have an auto-immune disease. My Dr. doesn't know what it is , and is referring me to a rheumatoligist. I have been trying to stay positive,but today was just a bad day. No sleep, lots of pain, and then the last straw of finding out I won't be able to get a Dr.s appt. until Jan. or Feb.. It just took the wind out of my sails.

I was so angry. I have so much to do everyday. I have a 2 year old, and 9month old at home, plus Ashley in the wheelchair again. I can't even lift her wheelchair right now. Everyday, I have littleones to feed, bathe, dress, diapers,pottytraining,cooking,cleaning, and I can barely move some mornings. It takes all Gods' grace to get me through the things I have to do, and there is always so much more that needs to be done.

Fr. Matthew said I think perhaps, you need a new patron saint. You may have completely worn yours out. After all, more things happen to you than anybody I have ever known. I asked if he had any suggestions. St. Margaret Mary and St. Lydia may be tired of such hard work all the time. Are there any saints out there that want to intercede for a wife, mother of 9 in this world, and 3 in heaven, a very hard worker, who spiritually wants to know, love, and serve God. Physically needs a little help and a lot of prayers. You saints mull it over and get back to me.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

crazy parents

I have often wondered if crazy football parents are born or, made. Nature vs. nurture pigskin style. Our motto is neither rain nor snow, nor distance, nor overtime will keep us from watching our children play.

Tonight was a homegame scheduled to start at 6:00p.m. . However, due to circumstances in earlier games, the boys didn't begin playing until 8:00p.m.. Keep in mind we had to be at the field at 5:00.p.m.. The weather was beautiful, and the stands were packed. Tiffiany had no idea so many people showed up to watch little kids play.

The boys won quite easily tonight. They have a record of 2-1 and tonights score was 24-6. Next week is our last home game, and we take to the road traveling obscene distances with cars full of children for pee-wee football. The announcer has a great sense of humor and announced that the Lyons club would be serving a pancake breakfast if we could hold on for about 25 minutes.

We may travel 60 to 100 miles for our distance games, and while I am the first to admit this is nuts, I'm still doing it. This is our 3rd son to go the pee-wee football route and , I can't believe we're starting over with this. We still have 3 more sons(maybe they'll take up golf or something). We could be doing this for 9 more years(sweet weeping Jesus on the cross).

When Kyle played high school football they traveled all over the dadgum state to places I never even heard of . Many games were played in border towns 3-4hours distance one way. Now I know they acclimated us to this craziness in their pee-wee days, and it just gets worse.

Connor made some great plays tonight , and was thrilled to have his own cheering section with Dad, Mama, Tiffiany, Ashley, Nicole, Jonathan, Sean Patrick, Christian, Alexandra, and his life-long favorite Billie Jo and her husband,and daughters.

You go Connor !! Tackle them, strip the ball , recover it . Love Mama

Thursday, September 25, 2008


Poor Connor, he has had such a time lately. First the spider bite, then the nasty staph infection, and to top it off , the stomach virus. It has been an unpleasant couple of weeks here in Tuckerville.

Connor is trying to adjust to 6th grade, and 3 different teachers. He has been very puzzled by the actions of his language teacher. Mrs. Sand has decided that the grammar of her students needs improvement. To encourage? her young charges she has given detention to anyone using colloquialisms or as I call it Grannyisms.

One poor boy spent an entire week in detention for saying ain't, the sad thing is he didn't know he was in detention for saying it. They just kept sending him over there. Where I live language is colorful , and full of expressions your grandparents might have used.

The list of forbidden words is long. It includes ain't , fixin' to, and done did. You must pronounce your g's at the end of each word, and for heavens sake do not use those inflamatory ejaculations such a sure nuff, cryin' out loud, or a whee down yonder.

I do understand the need for the children to speak proper english, it just takes all the fun out of the conversation, when dangit they done did can't say nothin' no more.


Kyle had 4 wisdom teeth pulled on tuesday, and he is still not feeling well. He is so swollen, he doesn't know if we should call him chipmunk Kyle or Frankenkyle. He is a mess.

The pain rx makes him sleepy, and the steroids for the swelling (yeah sure) are turning him into a bear. He snarls and growls and goes right back to sleep.

Tonight he came in and asked me to drive him to school in the morning. He doesn't feel like driving the 30 miles for classes on no pain meds. I am going to try and bribe Andrew into taking him. I'll let him drive my car, and buy him McDonalds. That should do it.

Kyle is supposed to go back to work after classes and work an 8 hour shift. I just don't know if he can make it all day.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Bye-Bye Billy

After the attack of Billy the goat, I am still recovering from all the bruises I received from the crazy, psycho goat. I asked my dear neighbor Rosemary, and her husband Tim if they would take Billy to the goat sale, eleminating the need to shoot the unrepentant goat.

Tim and Rosemary are always helping me with something. I can't count how many times Tim has pulled me out of ditches when I've slid off the road or something. When my husband worked nights, I always knew they were just a phone call away.

One night the burglar alarm went off , and I was home alone with 5 children and pregnant. The alarm company asked if I wanted to go outside and check it out. No I did not . I couldn't even out run the bad man at that point. While I waited for the sheriff to show up , Tim and Rosemary came down checked the yard and out buildings. They were at my house almost 30 minutes before the county sheriff even showed up. I know who to call first.

Tim and Rosemary came down and caught the goat. He is going to spend a week or 2 visiting their nannies, and then off to the goat sale. Connor is excited about getting the money for his goat. He's thinking about raising nannies to show for 4-H. Good riddance.

Pay it Forward

A few days ago, I received an envelope in the mail. Something in the mail for me and , it wasn't a bill. It was a wooden primitive bluebird from Angie @ the American Homemaker blog. My dear daughter-in-law tried to take my bird home with her, but I think I will put it on the front porch with my fall display. I think it will look great with pumpkins and such.

There is a small catch to my prize, and my dilemma. I am supposed to pay it forward, and send 3 people a gift. Now , I am out here all alone in bloggyland. I don't have 3 people to send anything to. I pondered this today, and came up with my own solution.

We have 3 widows in our parish, and I will give each of them a card, and a small fall gift. When(if) I ever have 3 reader, I will pay it forward in bloggyland.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Chivalry is not dead

Fr. Matthew called today to check on me. I haven't seen him since he went to live at the Monastery in June. He has been a great blessing to me, and my whole family. He was our parish priest for 10 1/2 years. He baptised 4 babies, buried1, and married my oldest son. He has a dry sense of humor , stands just over 5 feet tall and is 86 years old.

His greatest fear in returning to the monastery was that they would take his car away. He was overjoyed to find a parking space with his name on it right in front. Age has its privliges.

He asked lots of questions, he wanted to know everything that had been happening in our lives lately. I gave him a complete run down . Including the family members that had been down with the dreaded stomach virus. Kyle, Andrew, Ben, Connor, Christian , and last but not least Alexandra who spent 2 days projectile vomiting. I think priests need a peek at large family life.

He told me "God must love you very much" . I said what are you talking about. He said things always happen to the people God loves very much , and something, everything is always happening to you!!!!! I couldn't argue with that one and soon our conversation turned to farm life.

He was raised on a poultry ranch , and likes to talk about the chickens, and hear my stories about the turkey thinking he's a rooster. I was explaing to him why I had been feeding, and putting the chickens up at night since it is Connors' job(The crazy chickens were roosting on my front porch ). I felt so sorry for him. First the staph infection in his arm, then the yucky stomach virus. After I put the chickens up Billy the goat went berserk!!!!! He thought I had food or scraps , and trapped me in an area without a stick, or a bat, or a gun. He was jumping and bucking , I had never seen him so crazy. He rammed me twice in the stomach. He hit me so hard, he knocked me up over a hedge, and into the gazebo about 5 feet. He broke the skin on my stomach and leg. I have welts and bruises everywhere. The children heard me screaming and ran to my rescue. I said get your Daddy, and tell him to bring the gun this time. He came out and chased his wretched goat away, but wouldn't shoot him.

Dear Fr. Matthew said that goat is a menace, and serves no useful purpose. If, I still lived down there I'd bring my gun over and take care of that goat. He said now my dear , you and the children lure that goat into the back pasture, and shoot it. It has become far to dangerous. And what will I tell the husband, that happens to like the goat? He said tell him bad news dear, I was shooting into the back pasture, and the goat ran into my bullet.

Mrs. Doodlebug

Nicole aka Mrs. Doodlebug has been so busy lately. She is my right hand. She bathes little ones, changes diapers, sweeps floors, helps with dishes, laundry. The unending lists of my life. She is a little mother to her younger siblings and a great help to me.

She is on the jr. high softball team, a member of student council, a member of 4-H, takes piano lessons, is an altar server at Mass, and helps her Mama everyday. She does everything exceptionally well.

Our dear neighbor Rosemary who always is rescuing things from the strangest places, found the most beautiful gown someone had thrown away. She washed and pressed it and gave this ivory satin and lace gown to Nicole. Nicole was thrilled, I was stunned at the transformation from little girl to young woman that is taking place. She looked absolutely beautiful in it. My husband told her she can't date until she's 30. Thank goodness she's only 12 , and we don't have to worry about that for a few years.

Nicole is a little bossy, but, she has 4 younger brothers, and a baby sister. She can be short-tempered, but, so can I. I think her very worst fault is .... she abolutely loves game shows.

New game shows, old game shows , any game show. Whammy, Beat the Clock, Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune. You name she'll watch it. I didn't even know we had the game show network, all game shows , all the time. Game shows make my skin crawl. I hate game shows. I can't change channels fast enough, and she's trying to buy another vowel. Just answer this one Mom. Ugh!!!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Is that a knot on your head, or can you spell concussion

The last few weeks have been non-stop craziness. A trip to the hospital 3 hours away for Grannys' heart procedure, A trip to the emergency room with Ashley, 3 trips to the Dr.s' office in 5 days, 5 trips to the pharmacy in the last 7 days, and just life.

My 2 year old has been very sick, and his behaviour has been TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!
I keep asking everyone who's child is this , and what happened to my sweet baby. I told my 16 year old daughter on the sneak that I think He's turned into the spawn of Satan, and she said well since your'e his mother , doesn't that make you Satan? She thinks she's so funny.

In a spawn of Satan moment my sweet baby pulled over a metal bathroom cabinet , and it, and the contents landed on my head. I only have a mild concussion. The Dr. says I'll be feeling my normal loopy self in no time. In the meantime , I am so crazy. My sentences don't come out right, I just feel strange, and my head hurts. I was looking for the car keys, and told Ashley, I can't find my shoes. So, she tells me theyr'e on your feet. And, I tell her not these shoes, the ones for the car. At that point , I decided driving to school was a bad idea.

It's not that the children don't laugh at me , because I am a bit eccentric, but this is ridiculous.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

I love a parade

The weather has been so beautiful lately, with just a hint of fall in the air. I am so glad that double digit heat is over. This afternoon I decided to take sweet pea out for some fresh air. This is no easy feat as she now weighs 21lbs 7oz at only 9 months. We began our promenade down the sidewalk , and onto the circle drive, when we were joined by a screaming 2 year old who thought I was leaving him.

The next to join us was Otto the weiner dog, followed by Fifis' dog Tika. Our ranks were swelling. I looked back again, and we had been joined by 5 chickens, 3 kittens, Mr. Joshua the Turkey, and last but not least Billy the stinky goat.

I love a parade, but this was getting ridiculous. I turned back up the drive, and made the loop back to the house with the animals trailing all the way.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008


My good neighbor Rosemary called Sunday to check on things, and I gave her the rundown. A houseful of sick children, Ashley back in her wheelchair, refridgerator dead. She said she'd ask her church to pray for Ashleys recovery. I said , if its not too much trouble can you pray about my fridge too? I felt a little weird asking a church to pray about my appliance problem.

If his eye is on the sparrow is this too much to ask about. Dear neighbor said no problem, people pray about appliances all the time. It's a very common request. I was a little surprised,but if its not insulting to the almighty I was in.

Monday, a friend from our parish called to see why I hadn't been at church, and I gave her the litany. She said, we are all family, why don't you let someone help you when things are so crazy?
Tell us what you need . I laughed at her and said, silly girl, a margarita, and a fridge would be nice. She made a few phone calls, Fr. Adrian , went to visit her Aunt and Uncle, and by Monday night I had a fridge.

I know , I know "ask , and ye shall receive, seek, and ye shall find" ... Just sign me up with old St.(doubting) Thomas.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Our Lady of Sorrows

Today is the feast day of Our Lady of Sorrows, she is very dear to me. 6 years ago Sept. 15,2002, was the due date of my 7th child. He died 17weeks into my pregnancy, and I still miss him. Luke Gabriel was born on April 9,2002. He had blond hair and blue eyes, all his fingers, and toes. He greatly resembled his brother, Jonathan.

God held me up during those terrible dark days after the loss of my child. I am glad to have carried this precious little one,even though he was not meant to know me in this world.

For years I was so sad he spent his brief life alone, and then one day I found the book "Angel in the Waters" it is the story of an unborn baby and his guardian angel keeping him company in the womb and counting the time until birth.

Thank you God for the gift of this book, and the realisation my dear son was never alone. For 6 years I have decorated Our Ladys' Altar in memory of my son, and the gift God gave back to me...I fainted on Sunday,Sept. 15,2002, it was on that bittersweet day I discovered we were blessed again and on April 30,2003 5 weeks early , Sean Patrick Charles was born.

Eternal Rest Grant unto them oh Lord, and may your perpetual light shine upon them, Amen.

Someday, I'm going to shoot that goat

To be completely fair, I just don't like Billy the goat. He is now on my hit list. Connor & Nicole went out to put away the turkey, and hens. They were tossing some watermelon rinds, and chicken feed into their house in order to coax them in, when Billy the bully decided he wanted some.

I heard the commotion and went out to help. The ladies were in an uproar, the turkeys' feathers were ruffled, and the children were running in fear of their lives. I picked up the biggest stick I could find, and went to save my babies. I whacked that goat on the head , which really ticked him off. He began bucking and twisting , so I whacked him again. Connor ran in one direction,and Nicole hid behing her Mama.

Stupid Billy goat came after us again, and wielding my stick like a baseball bat , I was ready to hit a home run , all the while yelling at Connor go and get Daddy, and tell him to bring the gun!!!!

Daddy did come out, he didn't bring the gun, in fact he thought it was hysterical. I told him and his crazy goat to consider themselves warned. That thing looks at me or my babies sideways, and he's history.

I have a gun, and I'll shoot that smelly sucker right between the eyes, and toss him over the fence for the buzzards. I mean seriously, he can't smell any worse dead than alive.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

sweet girl

It is so hard to watch a loved one suffer, struggle, endure. My sweet girl has been dealing with health issues her entire life, but one little slip, one fall, and everything is changed.
My daughter broke her hip 3 years ago, which was repaired by surgery. The bone however, did not recover, and she has limited mobility. Sweet girl has spent the last 3 years in and out of a wheelchair. Thursday afternoon, baby girl slipped and fell on top of her sister. She landed right on top of her fragile hip. She can't put any weight on it. She is unable to sit in her wheelchair for any length of time. She needs help to bathe, she is usually so stoic , she tries to hide her pain.
This time she can't . The simplest movements cause her to scream in agony
Her pain mskes me physically ill. I know the scriptures, I even have faith, but, the day to day reality of her pain, I just don't understand.
I have often heard the expression take up your cross. Is her suffering my cross?
Smiling, even laughing through tears is our normal. Will she ever walk again without pain?
I wish I was an optimist, one of those glass half full kind of girls, but I'm really not. I'll just pray for the grace to get through today.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

A day in my life

We all were looking forward to Saturday, the first game of peewee football, and in blows tropical storm Ike (I don't like Ike). Connor was so excited, first football game, first start, brandnew uniforms, and in came the rain. Tropical Storm rain isn't like your ordinairy rain. It rains forwards, and backwards, and sideways, even upside down. Sweet pea , Christian, and I retreated to the car during the 3 quarter as the rain blew up under my umbrella.
Rain should not blow up your umbrella!!! The hometeam won 14-0 and my wet, tired football player was thrilled.
We ate a gourmet dinner of fried chicken, mashed pot. and gravy. On top of all the weather, and football excitement, the refridgerator died today. We will hold services tomorrow when hubby and as many big boys as we can corral drag it out of the house. I am praying for a new,large capacity fridge on a very tight family of how many? budget.