a moms' life

I have never been very good at learning my lesson. I have been told over and over for years actually not to push myself so hard, my body can't take the abuse. Theoretically i get it. I know no sleep+no rest+fibromialgia+a house full of children=a very sick mama however, i was never very good at math.

I always see the cobwebs that need to be knocked down, the dust that accumulates daily in the country, the floors that need to swept continuosly, the mountain of clothes aka laundry, the cooking that has to be done because at my house these crazy people think they need to eat every single day, several times a day. It is enough to make a frazzled mama cry...

My husband tells me, you are not allowed to get sick, you are not allowed to be sick, the house does not function when you are down. (He can't find his socks) Even the chores the children are largely responsible for get behind when i am sick.

I will make a general confession at this point mea culpa, my fault, my fault, my grievous fault, i have not been taking care of myself as well as i should, i have not slept more than a few hours a night for the last month, and for the past 3 weeks i have been battling a fibromialgia flare up. The children have all been passing around some sort of crud from school, but until this week-end i was able to fight it off.

I started running a fever on wed. , but , i ignored it because i do that, fri. afternoon, i was really sick, sat, i had laryngiitis(try that with a house full of kids, they put a bell by my bed) my chest hurt so bad, i had trouble laying down. Ben tried to take me to the hospital, but you know my motto: hell no, i won't go! He was so mad at me on Sunday, i agreed to go to the DR. on Monday, but i got Bobbie Sue to take me, because Ben had another funeral to go to.

I got the lecture once again, if you don't take care of yourself, how can you take care of your family, but that is so much easier said than done. I don't see anyone else volunteering to stay up with fussy, sick or teething little ones, and the truth is the littles don't want anyone else, and who can rest when their child is crying for them?????

I have bronchiitis in one lung and pneumonia in the other, I am running a fever and trying to cough my lungs up... I feel great!!!I look great too!!!I am supposed to drink lots of liquids, stay in bed and you guessed it rest!!!!how in the heck they think i am going to do this i don't know. Christian, Alexandra and I are sitting around in our pajamas, I have given them breakfast, I have run to the bathroom with Alexandra, and chased the puppies out several times. I have 3 more hours until Nicole gets home, and I am so weak, i can't do any laundry because i can't lift it. Oh well, we can all crawl in my bed and sit there and watch cartoons, that sounds so educational, it is one of those days, do what you have to so survive, the rest will have to wait.