slipping

It is always fun to write a post that is funny, crazy, or just plain weird...

We often have weird things going on here, it just can't be helped. This week though everything is sad and tinged with grief and sorrow...

We went in one day from the joy and anticipation of a new child to the chilling realisation that dream was over..

Dr. Nanda and her staff treated us with dignity and respect, and as we discussed all our options I went with what I believed to be her best suggestion. i had some problems with hemorraging, and i remain week and exhausted. I have bruise all over my arms and legs. I am starting to supect surgical nuses beat you up, when you are out...way out

We are celebrating the life of our baby with a memorial Mass of the Angels on Wed. June 2.we have given her the name Madeleine April Marie...

And while my body and spirit try to heal, i am struck by the gifts in my life. Nicole who is taking care of everybody, Ashley who is doing dishes and singing...the boys well, being boys, and my dear Lola tucking me in for a nap, and kissing me all over to make me better..

Luke Gabriel Tucker

This is always a rough week for me, as we approach the 8th anniversary of Lukes' death, I know my grief is still raw, and at times very fresh.

Yesterday, Kyle and Timmi came over, and they wanted to take me to the little store with them, and buy me a treat. The conversation turned to Lukes anniversary, and Kyle in tears handed me a letter he had written to his baby brother.

I thought my heart would break all over again, as I read my sons love letter to the baby brother that died too soon. His love, and the sense of loss he still feels was so hard to bear. He talked about the things he was unable to do with his baby brother, and the only time he was able to hold him.

There is a knot in my stomach that won't go away. I know Kyle is a very sensitive and loving young man, but it helps knowing that others still remember and love my baby boy...

In loving memory of our sweet baby boy : Eternal rest grant unto him oh lord, and may perpetual light shine upon him...Luke Gabriel Tucker born and died April 9, 2002.