it is a battle

I have been battling this last round of kidney infections since Dec. The battle wax and wanes...sometimes I think the battle is over, and then the infection pops up again..

I spent yesterday in the office of a new urologist...it was unpleasant, but he was kind..i feel a little more hopeful this is a battle that can be won...or maybe just managed?

I have so much that really needs to be done today, and as i survey the damage done to my home in the 2 days I was gone for tests, tests, and more Dr. office fun...I just want to go crawl back into my bed...

It really isn't that bad, and i could probably restore order in a few hours, but that is energy i just don't have right now...I also have birthday cakes to bake for Aarons dinner tonight...and my body just wants to go lay down...

I would use my will power, and just force myself to push on...but, i have done that for so long, I just don't have any push left in me...maybe later...but for now, I think I am going back to bed...

threats or promises

My Dr. called from the hosp. Sat. morning, she had checked on my lab work, and called to tell me i was very sick. She told me to stay in bed and drink....gatorade, cranberry juice and water...no dr. pepper, that probably lets out margaritas too, but i didn't have the nerve to ask....

I feel a little better today, i just get so tired , so fast...i am going to follow orders this time, as she threatened to stick me in the hospital because i am so sick...she and i both know i am not going...the hospital is full of sick people....she said i don't take care of myself....

I did remind her it is a little hard to focus on yourself when you have a 3 year old with the flu, and a 22 month old as entertaining as my Alexandra....then you just start adding in the other children, and things really get out of hand....rest is not something that comes easy for mommies...

i really hate this gatorade....i would much rather drink the banned dr. pepper....